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The Watch have sent a comprehensive report on last month’s highly successful Watch Open Weekend to the Palace this morning, the Times can exclusively reveal. Spokesperson Captain Shivers was available to comment, describing the weekend as a “hugely overwhelming success that all of us on the Watch Open Weekend Steering Committee are tremendously proud of.” She went on to say that the Open Weekend initiative “could not have achieved so much without the incredible effort on the part of the Guests and the Committee, not to mention all the hard work put in by our excellent Tech, Watch and Gopher volunteers.”

Capt. Shivers also mentioned all the Special

Constables who signed up, saying that “everyone who attended was lovely, and we hope they all had even more fun than we did.”

She then went on to effusively thank “all the local businesses who donated to our hamper raffles (especially O’ Connaills for the chocolate); everyone who generously donated to the Charity Auction, Penguin Random House for supplying our membership bags; Cork Convention Bureau for maps and pens and postcards to put in them; all of our brave and talented participants in the Maskerade and the Murder Mystery...” After stopping for breath, she continued: “...and of course everyone who attended, who made the weekend into a pleasure

and a real honour to be a part of.”

An anonymous source within the Watch has informed the Times that a significant part of the report delivered to the Palace concerns the truly astonishing amount of money raised for charity by the Special Constables during the weekend. The Times can exclusively reveal that the final sum raised by the Charity Auction was €4597, split between three charities – on top of the €432.67 raised by raffling the hampers of produce. Our source also confirmed that the sums of €416 and £15.01 were generously donated to RICE by members of the mysterious Lodge of The Ancient and Illustrious Order of Old Bar Stewards during the Open Weekend.

Excitement is mounting about the imminent Watch Open Weekend, as today the programme for the historic event was released to the general public. Watch spokesperson Captain Shivers was quoted as saying: "With exactly a week to go, we are very

proud to announce the jam-packed, varied line- up of events that will be occurring over the weekend. For those of our eager recruits that like to be prepared in advance, you can view the programme on our website." Capt. Shivers was also quick to  assure

the Times that people equipped with hi-tech portable-clacks devices would also be catered for, saying that "there is an up - to - the - minute version available using the Eventbase app - just search inside the app for the 'Irish Discworld Convention'."

Watch spokesperson Captain Shivers read out a prepared statement earlier today: "It is with great regret that we announce that the learned Dr. Jack Cohen will be unable to attend the imminent Watch Open Weekend," she stated.

She strongly denied any rumours that his absence was caused by dangerous

experiments gone awry, instead explaining that "while he is in good health, he is no longer in a position to handle the various demands of a convention, not to mention air travel."

She went on to say that "while Jack and his fascinating lectures will be greatly missed at the Convention, we at the Watch will endeavour  to

still have a good time without him, thanks to our dazzling array of other guests."

Dr Cohen ("Rich in years, thank you so very much") co-authored the Science of Discworld books along with Ian Stewart and Sir Terry, in between his regular day job of being a highly distinguished academic and lecturer.

The much-anticipated Watch Open Weekend later this year has just unveiled a glittering array of Convention-themed merchandise, the Times can exclusively report.

Captain Shivers, Watch spokesperson, had this to say on the subject: “We at the Watch have a long-standing tradition of well-equipped officers, and we mean to make sure the recruits at the Open Weekend are no exception! As you can see from our website, we have recently made a variety of themed merchandise available for pre-order, including not only the T-shirts and

polo shirts, but also the Magic Mugs and specially made 3D-printed badges too.” Upon further questions, she admitted that the mugs had “no actual magic involved in their manufacture, but they do change colour when a hot drink is added”, stressing that there was no danger of magical fallout to the general public. Capt. Shivers also stated that there would be an extremely limited stock of the merchandise available at the Weekend itself, and urged recruits to pre-order to avoid disappointment.

Captain Shivers also confirmed  rumours  that

the Sunshine Sanctuary for Sick Dragons’ Annual Gala Dinner would be taking place as part of the Watch Open Weekend festivities, and encouraged recruits to book their tickets now, going on to say that “the Sanctuary’s annual Gala is one of the highlights of the Ankh-Morpork social calendar. We’re very happy to be hosting this year’s Gala at the Watch Weekend, which has nothing whatsoever to do with the fact that Lady Sybil is married to the Watch Commander, and we condemn any rumours to the contrary entirely.”

by S. Cripslock

"The Irish Discworld Convention has received word that a number of fascinating characters are attending in October - we say 'received word', possibly our grovelling and promises of free drink had something to do with it.

We're delighted to announce that Reb Voyce and Ian Mitchell of the Discworld Emporium will attend. As well as being a partner at the Emporium, Reb Voyce performs the harrowing, possibly life-threatening task of herding Ian Mitchell and Bernard Pearson away from the pub and back into the workshop. Perhaps she regrets the life choices that have brought her to this  point, but since  she

describes herself as "hiijacked by Discworld and couldn't be happier" it seems she's doing all right.

Ian Mitchell was doomed at the age of fourteen when he started hanging around the Emporium looking for work experience. After they wrangled all the free labour they could, Mitchell was made a member of the team upon completion of his degree at Falmouth College of Arts. His artwork can be seen in such items as the Discworld Stamps, and is he currently working on a Discworld Atlas, as well as the Discworld Bestiary.

And that's not all! Leonard Boyd and David

Brashaw of Backspindle Games are also set to attend. Not only are Backspindle winners of the Best New Family Game award at the 2015 UK Games Expo, they are also the creators of the boardgame 'Guards! Guards!' (which sold out worldwide in 2011) and have chosen IDWCon 2015 to hold the launch of the newest Discworld board game, 'Clacks'! Our Con artist Amber did the artwork for that.

Unfortunately, we've also received word that Isobel Pearson is unable to attend, which is a shame. We'll all have a pint of Guinness in her honour. She has a lot of honour, so we should probably have three or four, just to be on the safe side."

Discworld's Creator, Sir Terry Pratchett (66), has walked with Death into the desert on Thursday the 12th of March, in the Roundworld year 2015. He died at home with family¹ and with his cat asleep on the bed.

Our deepest sympathies go out to the close friends and family of our beloved Sir Terry Pratchett. He has brought so much joy to so many of us through his wit and wisdom, and his departure from this existence will sadden us all. He was an amazing author, but more than that, an amazing person, and all of his fans, whether they had a chance to meet him in life, or just through his words, will feel this loss keenly.

The world is still reeling

from this news, and fans everywhere are uniting in grief. The Irish Discworld Convention was always intended as a place people would gather and share their joy in these books and this universe. We will continue to honour Terry by gathering as a 'bunch of loonies' and paying tribute to him and his creation. If you have any thoughts or ideas on this

subject to contribute, please contact us at: info@idwcon.org.

As Terry himself said, no one is actually dead until the ripples they cause in the world die.

We intend to keep making ripples.

by S. Greaney

¹ The inestimable Rob Wilkins is counted as family, obviously.

Hotel bookings for the Watch Open Weekend have just been made available, the Times can exclusively reveal. In an interview with our correspondent, Watch spokesperson Captain Shivers acknowledged that it is now exactly one year to go until this historic Watch outreach programme. She had this to say on the subject:

"In light of reaching this important milestone, we have published details of how to book a room at our venue, the Cork International Hotel, not only for the enthusiastic recruits that have already signed up, but also for any potential others who may be interested in this excellent opportunity to serve alongside our great

City's finest."

Capt. Shivers strongly denied any rumours that the hotel had been booked up by the Sunshine Sanctuary's annual fundraiser, and confirmed that the Watch Open Day would go ahead on the 2nd-5th of October next year. More reports to follow as the story unfolds.

In an unexpected move, the Watch have opened sign-ups for the Open Weekend scheduled to take place next year. The announcement came as part of the annual memorial ceremony for the Glorious 25th of May, much to the surprise of all present at the otherwise subdued occasion.

Commander Vimes was sadly unavailable for comment, but spokes- person Captain Shivers said on the subject:
"Truth, Justice, Freedom and a Reasonably Priced IDWCon Membership! To buy a membership, simply go to the Membership page on our website and follow the instructions." She also confirmed rumours that the Convention will be taking place in the Cork International Hotel from the 2nd to the 5th of October 2015.

Further enquiry showed that memberships would cost €50, though Capt. Shivers was quick to add that there would also be "a concessionary rate for full time students, pensioners, and sundry. Please read the Terms and Conditions to check if you qualify." After some rather persistent questioning by a representative of the Merchants' Guild, she also disclosed that she was "delighted to offer an optional 20% discount to those who book early;

just use the voucher code 'earlybird' when paying."

Captain Shivers ("No, I'm not telling you my age. And stop writing that down!") concluded the press conference by exhorting the assembled crowd, saying that "The City Watch needs you! Come and join us for a weekend of fun, frolics and frivolity involving all things Discworld." More news to follow as the story unfolds.

by S. Cripslock

A Watch representative, Captain Shivers, read out a prepared statement earlier today:
"Hear ye, hear ye, lads and lasses. We’re pleased as punch, and so very proud, to announce that the 4th Irish Discworld Convention will be held from the 2nd to the 5th of October, 2015. We’ll be hosted by the Cork International Hotel. And, as  you  will

see from our stupendous new website, the theme will be the Watch Open Weekend."

She went on to add:
"We’ve updated the website, so it should have all the information you need to know, but if there’s something you need to know that we haven’t covered, feel free to get in touch on info@idwcon.org."

During the lengthy press conference, she revealed that memberships for the convention will be going on sale on the Glorious 25th of May.

Captain Shivers also invited any interested bystanders to "join us on Facebook or follow us on Twitter". More updates to follow as the story unfolds.

Iconograph by Otto Chriek